An Attempt On Understanding Self-Consciousness ... or Something

Here is a blog post that follows no organized thought or confirmed beliefs but rather naive wonderings and questions about the human mind, self-consciousness and world spirits. ... or something like that. 

It first felt terrifying, yet obliging to have today's conversations written down. I had and still have NO idea what to put to conclusion about this, yet today's another step towards a more spiritual understanding of our world, let it be the material world, the spiritual world, the scientific world or the world that doesn't really exist at all anyways.

This week for our book club, we attempted to dwell into Osho's work, Creativity: Unleashing the Forces Within, focusing on Self-Consciousness. "Self-consciousness is a disease' Osho wrote. And continued with his arguments and examples, urging us to 'drop the ego ... and you'll be able to see things as they are, not as you would like them to be. And when you are capable of knowing the facts of life, you become capable of knowing the truth.' 

Whereas I first held the question  about how we should obtain 'creativity - the fragrance of individual freedom' individually and drop our ego at the same time, I became even more confused with the very basic question of: 'What is self-consciousness, what is self, and what is the ego?"

Which, many hours later, as we each headed home in our own direction after our get together and now with me myself alone to gather my thoughts, I still do not have an answer for myself. It is interesting though, how many similar discussions have been going on throughout the course of history, through scientists, philosophers, religious leaders, and even writers, artists, and the common working class. However, today's engaging talk was based on the astounding consensus held within us that we were willing to believe something beyond science, beyond our material comprehension, beyond reason and facts. We were willing to reach into ourselves, our hearts and our 'spirits,' trying to grasp even the tiniest truth that maybe withheld within this world. space. universe. time. And here I think, even Science as its place.

Everyone who is seriously involved in the pursuit of science becomes convinced that some spirit is manifest in the laws of the universe, one that is vastly superior to that of man. In this way the pursuit of science leads to a religious feeling of a special sort, which is surely quite different from the religiosity of someone more naive.
 - Albert Einstein, Dear Professor Einstein: Albert Einstein's Letter To and From Children

It is also interesting to turn to Hegel today, though it seemed that he was talking about history, but I think at this point, history can also be referred to human consciousness - that human consciousness is like a river with constant change, and it's movements are determined by your point of observation, which means that there isn't an absolute truth or determining point of which to view this concept.

Today we were asked: Has everything that there ever was always been there, or has it been created from nothing to being something? It seems that, from answering this, we may be able to start finding our center and understand our own belief. 

I'm starting to see though, that there are many different forms of 'truth' and ways of seeing them. And Osho's may be just only one channel I may attempt and experiment with, which I may not necessarily have to agree with. The most important thing is about finding your balance, between what you believe is right and true, and also the balance of different believes between you and others.

I think ... :D